Canadian Army Low-Key Beefing With Geese at HQ 🦆 😠
Canadian army warns staff against aggressive geese at Ottawa HQ. The Canadian military is throwing up the deuces to aggressive geese at their Ottawa HQ. Nesting season is making these birds extra, so they're dropping some knowledge on how to chill with them without catching hands. Stay woke, fam, ge
TL:DR
The Canadian military is throwing up the deuces to aggressive geese at their Ottawa HQ. Nesting season is making these birds extra, so they're dropping some knowledge on how to chill with them without catching hands. Stay woke, fam, geese ain't playing!
The Deets
Okay, so listen up. The Canadian army just sent out a whole memo to everyone at their Carling Avenue headquarters in Ottawa. Why? Geese. Straight up, Canada geese are being extra AF during nesting season (that's March to May, FYI). Apparently, these birds are all about that turf war vibe when they're trying to build a nest.
The army's basically like, "Yo, don't even think about feeding or approaching these feathered thugs." If a goose rolls up on you, the move is to stay calm, keep your eyes locked on it, and slowly back away. If it gets real and the goose charges? Throw your arms up like you're trying to catch a vibe from the sky. Makes you look bigger, apparently.
Here's the tea: Canada geese are protected, so you can't just yeet them out of there once they start nesting. And while goose attacks are usually just a slap on the wrist (or maybe a peck on the ankle), word is you could actually get seriously hurt if you fall wrong. Broken bones and head trauma are a real possibility, no cap. So keep your head on a swivel, fam!
DND (Department of National Defence) isn't even counting the geese population on campus, but old directives keep it 100 - no touching the geese nests!
Abbreviations Glossary
| Abbreviation | Full Form |
|---|---|
| Low-key | Understated, subtle. |
| Beefing | Arguing, fighting. |
| HQ | Headquarters |
| Throwing up the deuces | Giving advice or warning |
| Extra | Over the top, dramatic. |
| Dropping knowledge | Sharing information, facts, or wisdom. |
| Stay woke | Stay alert and aware of what's going on. |
| Ain't playing | Not joking, serious. |
| AF | As f**k. Used for emphasis. |
| Turf war vibe | Fighting over territory. |
| Rolls up on you | Approaches you in an intimidating way. |
| Yeet | To throw something with force. |
| Slap on the wrist | A minor punishment or injury. |
| Keep it 100 | To be honest and genuine. |
| No cap | No lie, seriously. |
| Keep your head on a swivel | Be aware of your surroundings. |
| DND | Department of National Defence |